An expensive lesson

I’m a slow learner sometimes. So when I read on a blog that felting sweaters in a washing machine can damage the filter I went “pssshhaww, that won’t happen to ME“. You can see where this is going already can’t you? Yeah. Well I couldn’t. Like I said: slow learner. So I just want to warn you: if you felt sweaters in your washing machine you will break it.

If you felt (for example) a tan men’s size large wool sweater (hypothetically) that sheds like crazy then you felt two much, much less sheddy blue/purple lambswool and angora womans sweaters….the tan one will have already blocked your filter and you’re basically f***ed. You will, in no particular order, have to get your very patient beloved to empty the full drum of all the dirty water, then drain the filter which is on the side, an inch from the floor and naturally requires moving the big chest freezer. Then the next day you will think it is fixed, do an enormous load including, because you lost so much weight, the only pants you own that fit you right now. This will necessitate wearing your darling’s balloon shaped track pants with a layer of ginger cat fur. You will then try to drain the machine yourself, marking the lino as you move the chest freezer, flooding the laundry, using 3/4 of the towels you own to stop the flood (your only piece of good luck is it will not reach the hallway carpet) so not only do you now have a pile of waterlogged, half washed clothes but you also have that pair of jeans that have to be washed separately (they’re still leaking dye when wet) and a pile of towels that urgently need a wash. And that still broken washing machine. And not surprisingly a headache and a mild stomach ache. You may also want to cry but try not to start because you might not stop for a while. It’s been that sort of year.

So your sweetheart will come home from a full day at work to find he has to shuffle past the chest freezer, enpty the washing machine drum, drain it, poke around for a blockage that can’t be felt and press lots of buttons. Just as you think it is fixed…it will stop. You will take a sodden load of towels, a sodden load of clothes and your jeans to the laundromat – wearing large, badly shaped men’s trackpants in public (call it justice for breaking the machine) – where you will spend a small fortune to wash it all.

So the moral of the story is when someone says you’ll break your machine….believe them . Or at least buy a second pair of jeans. Mens track pants really don’t fit well on women.

(This has been the very worst year. In two months we have had a wasps nest – the biggest the exterminator has ever seen, about 40 inches across – in the ceiling, fleas in the carpet, the Chrischurch earthquake, the garage burglary, borrowed money (we spent all our money trying to kill the fleas and after 3 tries had to call the professionals) and now the washing machine has broken. We can only take so much. It’s very nearly too much.)

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6 Comments

Filed under randomness

6 responses to “An expensive lesson

  1. Glenda

    ((( Steph ))) Girl, look up and tell me if that little black cartoon cloud, the one that rains and showers down “bad things will happen” vibes, is hovering above your house??? Send it away, pronto!!!

    Aw, man, I’m so sorry about your washer =(. As you know, I tempted the washer fates a couple months ago, myself. I came out unscathed that time . . . “that time” being the key phrase ;-). I’m sure I will tempt those fates again sooner than later. Not with felting (wool allergies), but with overloading the washer. I do have a second pair of jeans, and a couple pairs of shorts that are okay to wear in public (at least, to the laundromat), so I’m prepared, I suppose.

    I’m so sorry your 2011 has been quite the rough start financially. Hmmm, I’m searching for a good side . . . okay, the good side is that you don’t have save up an arm and leg for the fertility treatments. Doesn’t really help fatten up your bank account, but it doesn’t deplete it either ;-).

  2. bookwormbethie

    i don’t have many words of wisdom for you, but things can only get better right? thinking of you!

  3. You have just had all the bad luck you are going to have for a while!
    My washing machine broke when I had a baby with diarrhoea- I can tell you that really is bad timing!
    I think you should go out clothes shopping to cheer yourself up!

  4. Been there – done that. Only consolation was that my floor is all tiled so it was easy to mop up the water. Actually the bag (not a sweater in my case) hadn’t felted at all, but had shed loads of fluff.

  5. shareberea

    oh no! That really, really stinks. I felt in my washer and instead of doing the right thing, I just carry vague dread with me. After reading all this sad story I need to do things properly. In my house a broken washer would be an emergency.

  6. Some days are just a bit crap like that.
    As a teenager, for some reason once when we were totally broke there was a few weeks with a broken dryer, a leaky ranch slider, etc, etc.
    The crowning glory though – the day that a visitor came to the house. Went and used the bathroom, and voila, the toilet floor collapsed, and the beautiful pink loo sank though the floor. He was not impressed.
    Anyway, the point is – at the time, it really was the last straw, but now is nothing but a funny memory. And so too will be the washing machine debacle.

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