I won’t go into details, it’s all rather frustrating to be in this broody state when we have both fertility problems and (lack of) money problems that make a baby a very unlikely thing for us for the forseeable future. Frankly I cry when I think about it. But yesterday my grandma and I looked at a couple of amazing shops. Posh people shops, that I don’t frequent. The first one had a section of baby toys and clothes that we oohed over. Her 61yr old brother just became a father so she’s looking for baby stuff. I thought that store was hard enough on my womb but then she dragged me into a fancy toy store with doll houses and a wall of the worlds cutest stuffed toys.
I get to meet the new baby next month at our Christmas dinner on the 16th, something I would normally enjoy but I am just dreading it now. If you have never been broody and unable to have a baby you’ll just think I am weird but I can honestly say I have never felt anything so…bittersweet.